Sunday, August 17, 2014
My day ended with me sitting on a stool crying, head in hands, utterly disappointed and thoroughly defeated as a Mommy. I'm quick to point out my fabulous days as a mother…though I wish there were more…but I tend not to share my complete failures. And tonight, I was taught a massive lesson by one of my five year olds.
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Anyone who knows me knows this has been a trying time. We closed out 2012 with the tragic and sudden death of my cousin Kevin. We started 2013 with my Dad falling down the stairs, fracturing his pelvis and suffering a traumatic brain injury as well as cuts and bruises. All of this...coupled with his Alzheimers, has made his recovery very difficult. Throughout it all I've kept everyone up to date on Facebook. Comments from friends have literally carried me through the days. I specifically remember one from my friend Ingrid after I posted for people to pray for Dad...She wrote, "Will whisper right into God's ear." I've thought of that countless times since reading it.
Friday, January 11, 2013
Wednesday, January 9, 2013
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
Monday, July 25, 2011
There are moments in my life with these boys that take my breath away. Like when I am steps from closing their door for the night and Luke calls from his bed, "Mommy...MOMMY..." I say, Yes baby...and he replies..."Bye bye Mommy," and he gives me a little wave. I like to think that's his way of saying "I love you." Of all the words I say to the boys I say those three the most..but name a different word and it's likely one they have picked up and can parrot back to me. But not those coveted three words. I have friends with kids who are younger that have already said it. I saw a 10 week old baby see it on a youtube video. But my boys are stinkers. They are making me wait. And that will make it mean that much more.
I have already gotten to experience so many of the things I have longed for as a mom: The bear hug. The absolute love and excitement they exhibit when they see me first thing in the morning. When they climb up into our bed. I always longed for my fridge to be covered with their works of art. And now it is. I wanted my boys to pick me weeds and call them flowers...and they do. To me they are roses. I don't care what their technical name is...all I care about is that they're pretty to my boys. That makes them pretty to me.
So I'll wait for "I love you" and I will cherish those three words like no others. Wouldn't it be great if we could all grow up and still see things through the eyes of a child. To not understand that life's full of weeds...to believe that every living thing is as valuable as a rose? Wouldn't it be pretty to think so?
Help! Max and Luke have started getting up at 6 a.m. every morning and I'm about to lose my mind. Last night I was up after midnight trying to get laundry done and finally fell into bed around 1 a.m. then 5 hours later BAM it's "Hi Mommy." I don't know how to make the boys sleep later now that they're in big boy beds. Locking them in their room just isn't safe in my mind. But wow, I'm exhausted.
So mommies, help me out. Will this go on ad infinitum? will they eventually sleep? Because I know they're tired. I just know it. They snooze through their morning activities. What i'm afraid you'll all say is that I need to get up and put them back into bed in the morning as I do with their naps. But Lord I am SO tired I just don't know that I can pull it off.